Excuse me sir but did anyone ever tell you you have nice eyes the type of eyes that remind me of child hood memories the ones when i laid in grass staring at the sky the werent brown but a nice clear hazale
Developing swv knees week my mind isn't but I'm for certain my heart is
Only if you see how determined my ambition for general conversation is
I bet your house is layer with jungle filled personalities with fruit fragrance
Showing kindness leaving hulk imprints on the bed sheets you swim in
Style smooth like rum cinnamon bun layer secrets but sweet frosted cover discreteness
Excuse me sir can I get to know you hiding under disguise like inspector gadget probably ranking my approach like judge on scale one to ten
I know the way my body talking you can see If I had one wish apart of you would be it
Skip first dates and get straight to relationships play no games cause life is too important unless your playing chance with me then I'm down from beginning to end
I bet on gloomy days you bring the sun with you in every way
Your smile lighten up
I bet you sleep with your window cracked so opportunity can climb through it whole your sleep
Wednesday, March 23, 2011
Wednesday, March 16, 2011
A Letter to My Brother
March 15, 2011 1150p.m
I recieved your letter
its been 2months since i last read something written by your own hand
It's been a year since i heard your voice
Its been 5since i last seen you
Everytime it gets harder and harder for me to write you
I can only image what you go through
Making grilled cheese sandwhiches on top of heaters
Washing clothes with your toilet water
Dealing with guards with devil horns
Locking you away past times so you couldn't eat your meals
Brother i know how you feel
I to get few meals
Trying to survive in there is better then being out here
Having to deal with changing faces
stearing into the barl of the gun in your friend hand cause they caught a glimps of what seemed to be a man
trying to escape those with horns hiding beneath their hats or du-rags
Yes its that bad
see you complain about daily work out and homie from cell block cd5 fouling you during bball
while i keep the complaints of nights almost being abducted && raped to that one day i was but escaped
you say the food you eat three times a day sometimes doesnt satifiy your needs well brother
trying not eating or only eating once before you lay to sleep
or how bout trying to fight the temptaion i puring poision down your thoart while trying drown the pain you inhale from bags of
brother do you not understand
your missing nothing
stop saying how bad you wish the bed sheets were thicker so they could hold 250 something pounds of weight
how you want to just start carving the walls with the knife you stole from the kitchens aid
i cant take it
Try being free standing on top of a roof by yourself ready to jump but cant because before that last swig of vodka your sons picture falls out your pocket and you stare at it
yes you missed 5 of his but i missed 10 of mine
brother more or less i should be locked up
I should be hidden from all the hurt
you don't understand of deep the pain burns my skin
from watching the lady that birth us cry more tears over her son then she ever did when i was sick
&& im not talking about that slight fever i might got the flu sick
Im talking about that diease ass kicking going through mri's doped up on medicine sick
I'll rather be looked at as a convice than a alcoholic fien or dope head
Now do you understand where this is going?
i want to hear things that would keep me motivated away from deaths doorsetp
No compliants about money because unlike you out here i really need it
write me describing dreams you have
that influence happiness
because brother i cant take it
Next time you write me i might of falling victim to complaints and stress && be chilling with death
I recieved your letter
its been 2months since i last read something written by your own hand
It's been a year since i heard your voice
Its been 5since i last seen you
Everytime it gets harder and harder for me to write you
I can only image what you go through
Making grilled cheese sandwhiches on top of heaters
Washing clothes with your toilet water
Dealing with guards with devil horns
Locking you away past times so you couldn't eat your meals
Brother i know how you feel
I to get few meals
Trying to survive in there is better then being out here
Having to deal with changing faces
stearing into the barl of the gun in your friend hand cause they caught a glimps of what seemed to be a man
trying to escape those with horns hiding beneath their hats or du-rags
Yes its that bad
see you complain about daily work out and homie from cell block cd5 fouling you during bball
while i keep the complaints of nights almost being abducted && raped to that one day i was but escaped
you say the food you eat three times a day sometimes doesnt satifiy your needs well brother
trying not eating or only eating once before you lay to sleep
or how bout trying to fight the temptaion i puring poision down your thoart while trying drown the pain you inhale from bags of
brother do you not understand
your missing nothing
stop saying how bad you wish the bed sheets were thicker so they could hold 250 something pounds of weight
how you want to just start carving the walls with the knife you stole from the kitchens aid
i cant take it
Try being free standing on top of a roof by yourself ready to jump but cant because before that last swig of vodka your sons picture falls out your pocket and you stare at it
yes you missed 5 of his but i missed 10 of mine
brother more or less i should be locked up
I should be hidden from all the hurt
you don't understand of deep the pain burns my skin
from watching the lady that birth us cry more tears over her son then she ever did when i was sick
&& im not talking about that slight fever i might got the flu sick
Im talking about that diease ass kicking going through mri's doped up on medicine sick
I'll rather be looked at as a convice than a alcoholic fien or dope head
Now do you understand where this is going?
i want to hear things that would keep me motivated away from deaths doorsetp
No compliants about money because unlike you out here i really need it
write me describing dreams you have
that influence happiness
because brother i cant take it
Next time you write me i might of falling victim to complaints and stress && be chilling with death
Tuesday, March 15, 2011
broken
BROKEN
The lamp outside my room flickers on && off
Reminding me of every second about how things use to be
Struggling to keep you in reach
Damn these energy save bulbs
Having to change you every week
Dimmer than the ones that were mark non go green
I should of just kept the old one
It seems I’ve changed myself && not the scene
Going green for others while forgetting me;
The part of me that means to be
Falling in pits of nails that stick me only in my eyes so I can’t see
Blinding me from the lies labeled on the box where you sleep
Sometimes staying on for hours at a time until I get comfortable enough && you start to flicker
Causing verbal tension between us because I know you cannot hear what im saying
All the while I’m screaming in my head
A ton of curse words while allowing “Got Dimmitt” to slither between my teeth
Reveling to those around me that there is some craziness within me
Even when their were black outs somehow you were the one light that stayed on
Warming the room with your glow
Defining your purpose
Making sure I never forget it
Trying to convince me you were more important than any light in the room
For some reason that’s all I would tell myself when I went out looking for new bulbs
In the mist of reading one night
oh this damn light
Started to flicker non stop until I was tight
Causing lash outs && the post on which it rested to be thrown to the ground
&& still this damn bulb did not give in && break
“it never did make sense to just throw away perfectly good bulb “
So I maned up && replaced the post moving it to a different room
Setting aside our differences hoping that this time it would behave && stay on when that the switch said
But of course after a few days things were back to being the same
Forcing me to open my eyes && see it for what things truly were
Looking over the box reveling that it was a knock off
Quickly finding one to replace it
I yelled at it
You stupid bulb
I cant stand it
Unscrewing the bulb to replace it with a new one
It broke in my hand
????
Lost in the mist of confusion
I started to miss it
It was actually broken
Damn how I miss the flickering
How when i needed it the most it was their
Shining light pon the darkness days i was scared
Now how could i build a bond with this now perfect one?
nothing's really ever perfect but this one
never seems to flicker or dim itself
it just turns on && off whenever i need it to
oh how i miss late night stares into the flickering light
i realize i enjoyed it
i enjoyed the going back && forth
frustration
Outburst that only consisted of us
me
but i broke it
how did i break it
i think it was just tiered of seeing me hurting
The lamp outside my room flickers on && off
Reminding me of every second about how things use to be
Struggling to keep you in reach
Damn these energy save bulbs
Having to change you every week
Dimmer than the ones that were mark non go green
I should of just kept the old one
It seems I’ve changed myself && not the scene
Going green for others while forgetting me;
The part of me that means to be
Falling in pits of nails that stick me only in my eyes so I can’t see
Blinding me from the lies labeled on the box where you sleep
Sometimes staying on for hours at a time until I get comfortable enough && you start to flicker
Causing verbal tension between us because I know you cannot hear what im saying
All the while I’m screaming in my head
A ton of curse words while allowing “Got Dimmitt” to slither between my teeth
Reveling to those around me that there is some craziness within me
Even when their were black outs somehow you were the one light that stayed on
Warming the room with your glow
Defining your purpose
Making sure I never forget it
Trying to convince me you were more important than any light in the room
For some reason that’s all I would tell myself when I went out looking for new bulbs
In the mist of reading one night
oh this damn light
Started to flicker non stop until I was tight
Causing lash outs && the post on which it rested to be thrown to the ground
&& still this damn bulb did not give in && break
“it never did make sense to just throw away perfectly good bulb “
So I maned up && replaced the post moving it to a different room
Setting aside our differences hoping that this time it would behave && stay on when that the switch said
But of course after a few days things were back to being the same
Forcing me to open my eyes && see it for what things truly were
Looking over the box reveling that it was a knock off
Quickly finding one to replace it
I yelled at it
You stupid bulb
I cant stand it
Unscrewing the bulb to replace it with a new one
It broke in my hand
????
Lost in the mist of confusion
I started to miss it
It was actually broken
Damn how I miss the flickering
How when i needed it the most it was their
Shining light pon the darkness days i was scared
Now how could i build a bond with this now perfect one?
nothing's really ever perfect but this one
never seems to flicker or dim itself
it just turns on && off whenever i need it to
oh how i miss late night stares into the flickering light
i realize i enjoyed it
i enjoyed the going back && forth
frustration
Outburst that only consisted of us
me
but i broke it
how did i break it
i think it was just tiered of seeing me hurting
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Friday, March 11, 2011
Thursday, March 10, 2011
lyric poem one
I can't stand it
its almost impossible to hold still
i dont even know but
if i had one wish
the robot with human hair
would already have you
break even
like heaven to touch
your just too good to be true
i can't take my eyes off of you
i can't stand it
my shadow is the only one that walks beside me
but whats even worse
she's got my heart tied in a knot && my stomach in a whirl
You got me so hypnotized
The moments I framed have cracked and crumbled
don't come to my house asking for a handout
My concepts are rested and manifest in ways you can’t forget
Now turn your back, cause I'm coming right up on you
One at a time
Change the voices in your head
i can't stand it
she makes dirty words sound pretty
Im not your type
Love is blind
I'll leave you hurting every night
I kissed a girl
Bad decissions; thats alright
Tryna do right by you got me here
Now all I am is alone
i cant stand it
This will all make sense in the morning'
Wednesday, March 9, 2011
Mary J Forever No More
No more invisible speechless, deaf and bling child
With neglected pleasures being addicted to denial
Floating through time, gravitating towards a warm arm
With an appetite for the emptiness that promises no harm
No more uncontrollable eruptions of emotional depression
A primal S.O.S. from the barren prison of selfless expression
that only the guilty with the innocent
Souls-know buried in social scar tissue of defective ego
No more relentless sifting through bodies seeking self
Settling through competitive combat for what's left on the shelf.
A mad melee of supply and demand driven by gullible pride that
leads to sedating the you that suffocates inside
No more - forever no more - because I've unshout my eyes
And the differences between God's word and Man's Wills was realized
Seeing opposing parallel lives some liquid, other frozen. Let me to never
seek from man what God has chosen.
Then the negative whispering subsided and the panicking ceased
the undercurrent suppression of pent-up terror was released as the
mystery of the unknown manifested pristine clear A positive message
of trught entered my ear
Now, across my face is a brand new smile
With a newly revealed meaning of a "Destine Child"
A message of hope is being released from my Heart
And I am overwhelmed with dedication to do my part
All I ever wanted was to be as I once was - Unbounded
Somehow it got all twisted and before long sounded
As though life was continuous connive-thrive-drive
Choking out the simple joy of just being alive
Now I am filled with love and I sing a love song
A song for yesterday, today, tomorrow, and beyond
My new prayer is - Thank You God for setting Me Free
And Thank You God - For Giving Me back Me
With neglected pleasures being addicted to denial
Floating through time, gravitating towards a warm arm
With an appetite for the emptiness that promises no harm
No more uncontrollable eruptions of emotional depression
A primal S.O.S. from the barren prison of selfless expression
that only the guilty with the innocent
Souls-know buried in social scar tissue of defective ego
No more relentless sifting through bodies seeking self
Settling through competitive combat for what's left on the shelf.
A mad melee of supply and demand driven by gullible pride that
leads to sedating the you that suffocates inside
No more - forever no more - because I've unshout my eyes
And the differences between God's word and Man's Wills was realized
Seeing opposing parallel lives some liquid, other frozen. Let me to never
seek from man what God has chosen.
Then the negative whispering subsided and the panicking ceased
the undercurrent suppression of pent-up terror was released as the
mystery of the unknown manifested pristine clear A positive message
of trught entered my ear
Now, across my face is a brand new smile
With a newly revealed meaning of a "Destine Child"
A message of hope is being released from my Heart
And I am overwhelmed with dedication to do my part
All I ever wanted was to be as I once was - Unbounded
Somehow it got all twisted and before long sounded
As though life was continuous connive-thrive-drive
Choking out the simple joy of just being alive
Now I am filled with love and I sing a love song
A song for yesterday, today, tomorrow, and beyond
My new prayer is - Thank You God for setting Me Free
And Thank You God - For Giving Me back Me
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