A Letter to My Brother

March 15, 2011 1150p.m
I recieved your letter
its been 2months since i last read something written by your own hand
It's been a year since i heard your voice
Its been 5since i last seen you
Everytime it gets harder and harder for me to write you
I can only image what you go through
Making grilled cheese sandwhiches on top of heaters
Washing clothes with your toilet water
Dealing with guards with devil horns
Locking you away past times so you couldn't eat your meals
Brother i know how you feel
I to get few meals
Trying to survive in there is better then being out here
Having to deal with changing faces
stearing into the barl of the gun in your friend hand cause they caught a glimps of what seemed to be a man
trying to escape those with horns hiding beneath their hats or du-rags
Yes its that bad
see you complain about daily work out and homie from cell block cd5 fouling you during bball
while i keep the complaints of nights almost being abducted && raped to that one day i was but escaped
you say the food you eat three times a day sometimes doesnt satifiy your needs well brother
trying not eating or only eating once before you lay to sleep
or how bout trying to fight the temptaion i puring poision down your thoart while trying drown the pain you inhale from bags of
brother do you not understand
your missing nothing
stop saying how bad you wish the bed sheets were thicker so they could hold 250 something pounds of weight
how you want to just start carving the walls with the knife you stole from the kitchens aid
i cant take it
Try being free standing on top of a roof by yourself ready to jump but cant because before that last swig of vodka your sons picture falls out your pocket and you stare at it
yes you missed 5 of his but i missed 10 of mine
brother more or less i should be locked up
I should be hidden from all the hurt
you don't understand of deep the pain burns my skin
from watching the lady that birth us cry more tears over her son then she ever did when i was sick
&& im not talking about that slight fever i might got the flu sick
Im talking about that diease ass kicking going through mri's doped up on medicine sick
I'll rather be looked at as a convice than a alcoholic fien or dope head
Now do you understand where this is going?
i want to hear things that would keep me motivated away from deaths doorsetp
No compliants about money because unlike you out here i really need it
write me describing dreams you have
that influence happiness
because brother i cant take it
Next time you write me i might of falling victim to complaints and stress && be chilling with death